An exceptional site regarding raising black boys in America.  I will be referencing Gillis Triplett often.

Exceptional Boys

7 Steps To Raising Exceptional African American Boys

There are some distinct steps that will place us on the path to raising exceptional African American boys. As we take these steps, we will instill in them purpose, confidence and a sure course of direction for their future. This rarely traveled path, once taken, will produce a mass number of boys who metamorphose right before our very eyes, into men who exemplify true manhood!

1. Insure That They Participate in Rites of Passage
One of the conspicuously missing elements in our families, communities and churches is Rites of Passage for Boys. For those of you who don’t know what a rites of passage is, I’ll define it by providing you with these appropriate illustrations.

Boot Camp is the rites of passage into the US Armed Forces. If a person fails boot camp, they are not allowed to serve in the military. The Bar Exam is the rites of passage to legally practice law in the USA. If a person fails the bar exam they are not allowed to practice law. Law school not only prepares them for the strenuous and intimidating bar exam, it helps ready them for a career in law.

One of the prime reasons men freeze or fail when it comes to manhood is because, truthfully, they don’t know what to do! False bravado and embarrassment keeps them from admitting their lack of knowledge. Operating under the same concept as law school and boot camp, Rites of Passage for Boys prepares boys for manhood. By the time they graduate, they will have addressed every facet of being a man they will face in adult life. Backed by indepth training, they enter into manhood tempered, tested, tuned and confident!

2. Insure That They Have Proper Male Role Models
Like sponges, boys absorb and then mimic what they see, hear and read. It stands to reason, we don’t want them mimicking the wrong sources. If they have no proper male role models to emulate, be forewarned; boys will mirror the next closest thing! Whether it is femininity, immature or riotous peers or Black men who are suffering from a male identity crisis. One way or the other, they are going to have role models. The question is, “What type?”

Will their role models cause them to be perplexed about manhood? Will their role models indoctrinate them to be effeminate, passive, immoral or abusive males? Will their role models induce them to use and abuse the female gender or become criminals or thugs? Will their role models influence them to use offensive language, mock God, shun marriage, be prone to violence or engage in homosexuality?

Mature parents who truly care about their son’s future will not only ask those tough questions. They will examine and critique their son’s role models to insure that they are being shepherded in the right direction.

Proper male role models perform critical assignments. They are a boy’s unequaled barrier and foremost guide. As barriers, they help boys identify and reject false bravado. As guides, they lead boys through the rough terrains of negative forces and societal pressures and safely navigate them into secure male identities and genuine masculinity.

Proper male role models teach by example what manhood entails. They instill in boys: courage, chivalry and bravery and set the tone for them on other crucial aspects of manhood such as maintaining a healthy male ego, being protectors, cultivators and providers. It’s up to us to insure that our sons have proper male role models!

3. Instill In Them a Respect For Their Fellow Man
To respect means: to show deferential regard for; to avoid violation of or interference with; the state of being regarded with honor or esteem; having an appreciation for. Boys must learn at an early age to respect their elders, women, authority, other people’s property and the law.

Words of respect such as, “Yes sir, yes ma’am, no sir, no ma’am, excuse me sir or ma’am, please and thank you,” must be instilled in boys as part of their lifetime code of conduct. If they are not taught to be respectful, by virtue of default, they will gravitate towards being disrespectful. Being infused with respect molds them into becoming chivalrous, honorable men of integrity.

I will display the remaining steps of this article in the next post. 

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